Is Being Wildly Happy Unsustainable?

As you know, I’m a proponent of choosing to be happy — wildly happy, even — and I am well aware that life is more fun when I make choices propelling me in the direction of happy.

But I’m not delusional. I have experience heartache, sorrow, disappointment, suffering…and know that being wildly happy doesn’t exclude me from experiencing all of the other emotions that fill up days and months and years, adding up to a lifetime.

All of my growth has come from the hard things.

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How To Be A Conscious Competitor

This time last year, I was crippled with a back issue called sciatica. For three weeks, I could barely get out of bed — which was physically excruciating and emotionally incomprehensible. I’ve been down before, suffering from viral meningitis in 2006 and it was humbling both times. I vowed I would take better care of my body to keep illness and injury at bay.

But it hasn’t been easy. Once I could finally function again last Spring, my physical movement was limited for several months because I couldn’t risk a relapse. I had been walking three miles daily before my condition so I was super frustrated that my body wasn’t able to keep the pace. I moved timidly, testing my capacity but not really going for it again, afraid and frustrated.

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The Expensive Habit of Comparing

While taking a long and vigorous walk along the shore, I realized I had slipped back in to the toxic habit of comparing. I don’t know if you’ve ever been to a California beach, but generally they draw what I’ll call the ‘cool people.’ You know who I mean — thin and fit men and women jogging along with beautiful dogs or baby carriages, sporting lycra, white headphones and swinging ponytails.

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Making a life

I am a maker. You are one too. How do I know this?

Well, our kind has always made things. In our earliest days, we made tools, food, and shelter.  We made babies. We evolved to make homes and businesses and relationships and technology and art and music and love and war and everything else that's ever been known or experienced. We are makers.

Knowing I am wired to make things

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Jumping From Airplanes

There have been times in my life when extreme adventure intrigued me; when I wanted to push my boundaries physically. After reading Cheryl Strayed’s “Wild” I considered how rewarding it would be to do the PCT or the Appalachian Trail. I was curious about white water rafting even though I was scared shitless of actually doing it. I didn’t DO either thing, but I had my fair share of wanderlust, and could certainly imagine the rush of such physically challenging adventures.

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What Is There To Celebrate?

n my fever dreams last week, I created a strategic process to help people make forward progress on something. It's kind of amazing how my unconscious mind knows what is needed even when my conscious mind is unaware. Stepping out of busy-ness and into self-care makes it possible for me to see what wants to be born.

At the core of this process is the way it begins -- with celebration.

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Putting Health Above Commitments

Does sickness ever come at the right time? It doesn't seem so, even though I generally believe that timing, in general, is somehow always perfect. I was scheduled to deliver a talk on Tuesday at lunchtime. Tuesday evening, I had volunteered to conduct mock job interviews with my friend Alicia who is doing groundbreaking work with ex-convicts about to re-enter the work world. I also had planned to travel to Santa Fe on Thursday to spend the weekend with my good friend, Peleg.

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What You Feed

What I focus on grows. This is true even if I am focusing on the negative aspects of the thing. But only every single time.

I could give you hundreds of stories where this truth has played out in my life. Ranging from my health initiatives to my art to my relationships -- when I'm putting my energy in those places whether it's in a positive or negative way, I get something back for it.

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Be Abundant Like Water

I'm inspired by the nature of mother nature. For example, a forest perpetuates itself naturally. As the seasons change the very essence of the tree knows to shed what is no longer sustainable -- acorns if you're an oak tree. The acorn forms and then lets go of the branch at the perfect time, as the wind moves it to it's resting place. The soil, fortified by the elements of sun and rain and snow nurtures the acorn until it grows into a sapling, which becomes a tree.

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You Are A Powerful Creator

I am too, but I didn't always know it. 

I remember sitting with my coach years ago, lamenting about what I wanted and why it wasn't happening. I wanted to be more dedicated to writing but I didn't think I had the time. I wanted more clients but they weren't coming and I made up an excuse for why it was so. I wanted more time freedom and if I wrote more and had more clients my time would be more limited, not less. 

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Unleashing Creativity

Several years ago, a friend invited me to participate in a three-week exploratory intuitive painting program. I didn't see myself as an artist and yet something about this program called me forward. I said yes.

Every day for three weeks, he'd send me an email with an art prompt. There were rules. I had to use large black sketch paper and chalk, and I had to fill the entire paper with my work.

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Why I Write

I've been thinking about what moved me to start writing, as I'm slogging through the rewrite process for my first full-length book. When I'm looking for inspiration, I remind myself of these things because it motivates me to keep going.

I write because I love finding just the right words to express something I'm thinking about or imagining. Words hold promise and power.

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Are You Creative?

I know how vital being creative is for me now, though I didn't always. It's difficult to believe how for years, I walked around the planet without seeing myself as creative. I didn't notice when I chose clothing or jewelry that creativity was involved. I didn't connect the work I did in the world as a creative effort. I was simply unconscious of my creativity.

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What Would You Love To Do

There have been times in my life where I've withheld myself from the vibrant possibilities available to me, missing the vital understanding that I am always safe, held in the arms of great spirit. Life is meant to be experienced deeply, in order to know both pain and joy. The middle ground feels like complacency.

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The Secret To A Happy Marriage

People are curious how my I've stayed married so long. They want to know what the ingredients are to a happy marriage.

This past Valentine's Day, I celebrated with my fabulous husband for the 38th time. I met him in January, and we had a date for V-day. I remember I drank too much wine and was relieved to be with someone on the lover's holiday for the first time in my short life. I might have just begun to realize I loved him.

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The Power of Loving Myself

Self-love is complicated, isn't it?

I used to be quite the faker. I'd coach others in the area of loving themselves, without having done the real work of loving myself. An underlying theme for me was "I'm not enough" and "I'm not worthy". I was afraid to admit this -- even to myself. I felt ashamed that I was portraying myself as a self-confident, empowered woman when on the inside I kept wondering if people would somehow accidentally get a glimpse of the real me.

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